The rules of Reg's apartment, and a few things she's learned from Charlotte

My thoughts are not very cohesive today, so I give you two lists.

The first is the agreed-upon rules of the Salamski-Reg household. The second is what I’ve observed from a week in Charlotte (I wish it could be what I’ve learned through actual interactions with people, but no one talks to me besides the neighbor.)Enjoy.

RULES:

1.       Rinse yo’ dishes ho.

2.       If you eat/cook, you clean yo’ own mess.

3.       If you want to talk to the pretty neighbor, bake her something first

4.       If it doesn’t need to be on/plugged in, it’s not (that’s what she said.)

5.       The best place to pick up ho’s is in your mind, not in the hallway.

Golden Rule: If you bring a ho’, yo’ roommate must know.

What I’ve observed in Charlotte.

Cross walks are suggestions, as are stop signs.

We wear t-shirts and athletic shorts

The weather report lies. Whenever it says there won’t be a thunderstorm, there will be.

Walking around with a male roommate is not conducive for picking up men.

Southern accents aren’t mandatory

The three main food groups are sweet tea, biscuits, and chicken.

Sometimes strangers greet each other. This is not weird.