So!
As most of you probably don't know, I've been at music camp for the past week and thus have been unable to post.
"But Summer," you say, "you totally did post like twice!"
Aha! Foolish mortals, I did NOT post! That was in fact Reg pretending to be me. Quite well, might I add.
In any case, I'm home and couldn't be more unhappy about it.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Friday, July 29, 2011
There is a place........~Sayuri~
There is a place, hidden deep within the recesses of my soul that houses my future. This picturesque scene is not realistic, not practical, and highly improbable...but it holds the essence of me. Hidden in this little valley between the crevices of what is and what could be lies a soft yellow house with a white porch surrounded by green grass and fields as far as the eye can see.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Reg and Summer's survey: What is the purpose of your existence?
I hate being serious almost as much as I hate attempting to be funny.
and despite this I thought I’d share a very informal, poorly constructed and biased survey Summer and I conducted—in an attempt to be both serious and funny at the same time.
The question: What is the purpose of your existence?
Sample: Well, we intended to ask every 3rd customer in line—either at the bank or the coffee place— but then we remembered that we detest people (and yes, we have jobs in customer service.) Thus we asked only people we knew. To be more specific, we only asked people we knew and saw on that particular day.
My AP Stats teacher would be so proud of our efforts…
Sorry if anyone is misquoted…I’m doing this from memory because I’ve lost the list (meaning I’ve washed the list off of my hand since I wrote it there three weeks ago…)
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Summer's Interview
Well, it’s time for a return to the list.
14. Interview an expert.
Who is this man?
Billy Love, the local player.
This man has dated nearly every eligible woman ( or not, he doesn't discriminate) in three counties, yet women still want to be with him.
And of course the young men want to be him.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Summer's Omelette
“Bad eggs make bad omelettes”--Pascalrascal
I’ve ranted about bad dates.
I’ve ranted about camp.
Now it’s time for all three, stirred together and fried to create one bad omelette.
Music is an expression of the soul. It would be plausible to think that a place dedicated to the creation of music would be a fairly low-key, soul-expressing experience.
False.
Symphony is communism—no, not socialism—communism. All instruments are equal; some are just more equal than others.
I am a rehabilitated violinist, so I experienced the “more equal” part of symphony. Now, however, I am a violist. I like to equate the viola to the alto of the high school choir. My theory is that every single memorable composer dated either an alto or a violist, and she burned him real bad. Thus, altos and violas are doomed with the same three boring notes of the chord, over and over and over and over…
(Pachelbel had issues with cellos though. I suppose he’s the exception. )
It’s alright though. At least I no longer have to exhibit false passion while being the first chair violinist’s stand bitch (page turner.) Also, all the chill “how the f*** did I get here?” instrumentalists sit in the back.
Thems my peeps.
Well, yesterday an old frenemy of mine was going to set me up with another instrumentalist. As I am not to partial to camp musicians right now (but if you play the uke, call me) or men (see Reg’s very distressed posts about her immature, insensitive, douche-bag boyfriend,) this set up may not be the best idea at this time.
And the violinist and I went on some quasi-friends/acquaintance/wtf? Awkward date-like lunches.
Perhaps I’ll play the theme to Jurassic park during rehearsal tomorrow…
Less than three,
Summer
And then she was bitten, and that was the beginning. The beginning, of the END; a post by Sayuri
Oh dear. Here I was being practical. Pulling out a calculator (via the super savings calculator!) which said in order for me to save $20,000 between now & May 19th 2014 (my college graduation date), it would take $588.24 per month. All of the sudden, a down payment on a $100,000 home seemed completely doable, totally in reach...and then, my practicality was stolen away from me. I was bitten. Bitten by...
Monday, July 25, 2011
Summer's obnoxious friend Reg who posts for her while she's away...
One of Reg's favorites:
I suppose you all have read Regette's ode to April...
Surprisingly, this post didn't make me angry.
It made me sad, thinking about poor Regette thinking for all these years that April is better than March.
So, out of the kindness of my heart, I've constructed a reply to her blog explaining how all her reasons were... Oh, how should I put it... Wrong.
And here it is.
Top 10 reasons why March is better than April:
1. If March weren't "an entire month of school without a break", April would cease to be so special to you because it would no longer promise the long awaited Spring break. Without March, April would be ruined.
2. Yes, March is mostly winter. However, winter is my favorite Season. In fact, out of Vivaldi's Four Seasons, "Winter" is the most spectacular and awe-inspiring... Even the slow movement! Also, you cannot use people with disorders to praise a month. What about people with allergies? They are virtually screwed in the spring. What about people with Narcolepsy? Due to spring break, there are more people on the roads at night and thus more people at risk of being hit by a narcoleptic driver. Therefore, people with disorders are not effective evidence to prove a point.
3. St. Patrick's day is not typically considered a religious holiday, while Easter is. What about Jewish people? They don't get presents on Easter. What about Jehovah's Witness children? They don't get to delight in leprechauns or the Easter Bunny. Therefore, holidays are also not effective evidence to prove a point.
4. Are you insinuating that no murders have occurred in April? If I were you, I would do a little more research...
5. In March, you are blissfully unaware of whether or not you were rejected from colleges and thus can continue your daydreams of coffee at Harvard or reading in Yale's library.
6. I... Have no problem with this reasoning.
7. Who freaking cares?
8. April needs a special occasion such as April Fools Day to make it special. March, however, need only be March to be special. March very much pwned.
9. I don't have T.V., and therefore don't care.
10. There are less months until you die in April.
And there you have it.
Less than three,
~Summer.
The above post was in response to:
I suppose you all have read Regette's ode to April...
Surprisingly, this post didn't make me angry.
It made me sad, thinking about poor Regette thinking for all these years that April is better than March.
So, out of the kindness of my heart, I've constructed a reply to her blog explaining how all her reasons were... Oh, how should I put it... Wrong.
And here it is.
Top 10 reasons why March is better than April:
1. If March weren't "an entire month of school without a break", April would cease to be so special to you because it would no longer promise the long awaited Spring break. Without March, April would be ruined.
2. Yes, March is mostly winter. However, winter is my favorite Season. In fact, out of Vivaldi's Four Seasons, "Winter" is the most spectacular and awe-inspiring... Even the slow movement! Also, you cannot use people with disorders to praise a month. What about people with allergies? They are virtually screwed in the spring. What about people with Narcolepsy? Due to spring break, there are more people on the roads at night and thus more people at risk of being hit by a narcoleptic driver. Therefore, people with disorders are not effective evidence to prove a point.
3. St. Patrick's day is not typically considered a religious holiday, while Easter is. What about Jewish people? They don't get presents on Easter. What about Jehovah's Witness children? They don't get to delight in leprechauns or the Easter Bunny. Therefore, holidays are also not effective evidence to prove a point.
4. Are you insinuating that no murders have occurred in April? If I were you, I would do a little more research...
5. In March, you are blissfully unaware of whether or not you were rejected from colleges and thus can continue your daydreams of coffee at Harvard or reading in Yale's library.
6. I... Have no problem with this reasoning.
7. Who freaking cares?
8. April needs a special occasion such as April Fools Day to make it special. March, however, need only be March to be special. March very much pwned.
9. I don't have T.V., and therefore don't care.
10. There are less months until you die in April.
And there you have it.
Less than three,
~Summer.
The above post was in response to:
The Fundamental Attribution Error-Regette blames her luck on her personality
Just In case I've forgot who I am:
Define yourself- challenge accepted.
Do so in one word? Well…
(I hate to be a downer but...you know what a jump break means...)
Do so in one word? Well…
(I hate to be a downer but...you know what a jump break means...)
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Reg can do that weird "serious post" thing too, just not well
A favorite quote I share from my mother is: "How could I have raised such a bitter and jaded child?" This question says more about me than it does about her; what type of 11 year old girl looks her mother in the eyes and tells her she "doesn't believe in romantic love?" The answer to the latter question is that I am. The answer to the first, however, is a bit more complicated.
(I guess this is the part where I try to be serious and I hope I make sense)
(I guess this is the part where I try to be serious and I hope I make sense)
32 Days....AHHHHHHHHHHHHH: a post, by Sayuri
It sounds obvious, but every day only happens once. This day will ever come around again, and each day is unique. I acknowledge that, however, I still find myself wishing that time would just speed up. I can't wait to be back at University with my friends, and more specifically, with Tom. I love my family & I enjoy spending time with them, but a large part of my heart is back at University, or at least in that general vicinity. OH well........here is me shouting in frustration "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
For the next 32 days,
~Sayuri~
For the next 32 days,
~Sayuri~
Saturday, July 23, 2011
33 Days...Breaking the Awkwardness Trend: A Post, by Sayuri
Ah, a serious post. How rare...just kidding :P We here at the Daily Dust do write serious posts every once in a blue moon.
Today, I am addressing long distance relationships............It is not original, and the following is nothing that will be earth-shattering to many of you.
My boyfriend, Tom, lives approximately one-thousand, nine-hundred, and ninety-seven point six miles away from me at this particular moment.
I am not complaining. At least, not really. Because Tom is one million percent worth dealing with the distance. I am one of the luckiest girls (if not the luckiest) in the entire world.
However, days like today make me
Today, I am addressing long distance relationships............It is not original, and the following is nothing that will be earth-shattering to many of you.
My boyfriend, Tom, lives approximately one-thousand, nine-hundred, and ninety-seven point six miles away from me at this particular moment.
I am not complaining. At least, not really. Because Tom is one million percent worth dealing with the distance. I am one of the luckiest girls (if not the luckiest) in the entire world.
However, days like today make me
Awkward Hugs--Reg impersonates Summer poorly
If only I could wear Summer's style of clothes quite like she can...
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Summer’s Stew
You’re welcome.
Question: Why are all the Daily Dust’s videos about awkwardness?
Answer: Awkwardness is a common affliction that the world should be exposed to.
Less than three,
~ Summer
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
What Reg Loves About the California Mid-State Fair
Working near the Mid-State Fair during fair-time is one of the best things about where I work. My average customer per day rate is 8.2, so I often need entertainment besides my usual occupation of thinking of how I've effed up my relationship. The Fair provides a variety of entertainment--and I don't even have to pay the 8 dollar admissions or eat deep-fried kool-aide.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Failing at Life: A "how to" by Sayuri
In case the title didn't fully suggest, I am admitting that (as of now) I fail at life. More specifically, I fail at...you guessed it,
It's "funner" to say "Arkansas" in Arkansas--Reg goes back to her "ruts"
Today I after I awoke, vulgarly insulted my alarm clock, and shoved the dog off of my side of the bed, I had a relization completely unrelated to the current happenings:
On August 2nd, 2011, I will have been in Arkansas twice in one year.
I will have been to Arkansas twice-- once was more than my fill of Wal-marts, cheap beer, poor grammar, and inescapable humidity.
Now, perhaps Arkansas isn't such a terrible place, but my perception of it is. My memories include being screamed at 6:00am in the morning because my door was locked and driving in a thunderstorm in an old Chevy that did not have windshield wipers.
There were a few good times-- like when tour guide Tanner told me "funner" is a word in Arkansas, or when I played "Highway to Hell" at my Aunt's wedding.
In reflection, Arkansas is one of those hilariously terrible places I've been. I wouldn't trade Arkansas for the world...well, to be honest if I'm swapping places I'll probably swap it for just about anywhere, so the idiom is meaningless.
ArKANSAS, I should say. It's "funner" to say "ArKANSAS" in Arkansas because the government tells me not to.
Your butterfly,
Reg
On August 2nd, 2011, I will have been in Arkansas twice in one year.
I will have been to Arkansas twice-- once was more than my fill of Wal-marts, cheap beer, poor grammar, and inescapable humidity.
Now, perhaps Arkansas isn't such a terrible place, but my perception of it is. My memories include being screamed at 6:00am in the morning because my door was locked and driving in a thunderstorm in an old Chevy that did not have windshield wipers.
There were a few good times-- like when tour guide Tanner told me "funner" is a word in Arkansas, or when I played "Highway to Hell" at my Aunt's wedding.
In reflection, Arkansas is one of those hilariously terrible places I've been. I wouldn't trade Arkansas for the world...well, to be honest if I'm swapping places I'll probably swap it for just about anywhere, so the idiom is meaningless.
ArKANSAS, I should say. It's "funner" to say "ArKANSAS" in Arkansas because the government tells me not to.
Your butterfly,
Reg
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Conversations with my mother always leave me feeling a bit less than normal...
Me: How do you know that I'm me when you don't see me?
Madre: ... I just know.
Me: But how would you know? You only know I'm me when you see me. Without seeing me, how do you know I'm me?
Madre: Because I believe in the existence of things.
Me: I would still exist, I would just exist as something else. Perhaps I wouldn't exist, but there would be no less existence in the world because I would exist as something else.
Madre: ...
***
Me: Evil is the root of all good.
Madre: *laughs*
Me: Really. Without evil, there would be no good.
Madre: That's true... but I wouldn't say that evil is the root of all good.
Me: Why not?
Madre: BECAUSE IT ISN'T.
Me: ...
***
Me: I keep meeting friends of the family at work... it's really weird. It must be a sign. I must be dying or something.
Madre: Dying? Why?
Me: Whenever I see a bunch of people from my life or people related to my life, I feel like I must be dying soon. It's like my life is flashing before my eyes through people.
Madre: ...
***later that evening***
Me: What time do we leave tomorrow?
Madre: 7:00.
Me: Sorry, I know I've asked that before... I feel like if I keep asking, it's bound to get later.
Madre: Nope, we leave at 7:00. You and your dad are leaving at 7:00 on Tuesday, too.
Me: Holy moly! It must be a sign.
Madre: A sign that you need to start going to sleep earlier?
Me: No! Remember what I said about the people at work?
Madre: Yes...
Me: I think the signs mean that if I don't start waking up by 7:00 and doing something during the day, I'll die without having lived a fulfilling life.
Madre: ... I don't think the two are necessarily connected...
Me: No, no! When you watch "Murder She Wrote", you learn that everything's connected! Building burning down? Murder that looks like an accident? Crazy letters flooding the town? Murder that looks like a suicide? ALL CONNECTED. Therefore, the two signs are DEFINITELY connected!
Madre: ... okay...
***
The sad thing is that all these conversations happened today...
Sometimes I question my sanity.
Then I realize that sanity is based on cultural perception.
Then I get bored of questioning sanity and watch "Murder She Wrote".
"Murder She Wrote" makes me question my sanity.
It's a vicious, vicious cycle...
Less than three,
~ Summer
Me: How do you know that I'm me when you don't see me?
Madre: ... I just know.
Me: But how would you know? You only know I'm me when you see me. Without seeing me, how do you know I'm me?
Madre: Because I believe in the existence of things.
Me: I would still exist, I would just exist as something else. Perhaps I wouldn't exist, but there would be no less existence in the world because I would exist as something else.
Madre: ...
***
Me: Evil is the root of all good.
Madre: *laughs*
Me: Really. Without evil, there would be no good.
Madre: That's true... but I wouldn't say that evil is the root of all good.
Me: Why not?
Madre: BECAUSE IT ISN'T.
Me: ...
***
Me: I keep meeting friends of the family at work... it's really weird. It must be a sign. I must be dying or something.
Madre: Dying? Why?
Me: Whenever I see a bunch of people from my life or people related to my life, I feel like I must be dying soon. It's like my life is flashing before my eyes through people.
Madre: ...
***later that evening***
Me: What time do we leave tomorrow?
Madre: 7:00.
Me: Sorry, I know I've asked that before... I feel like if I keep asking, it's bound to get later.
Madre: Nope, we leave at 7:00. You and your dad are leaving at 7:00 on Tuesday, too.
Me: Holy moly! It must be a sign.
Madre: A sign that you need to start going to sleep earlier?
Me: No! Remember what I said about the people at work?
Madre: Yes...
Me: I think the signs mean that if I don't start waking up by 7:00 and doing something during the day, I'll die without having lived a fulfilling life.
Madre: ... I don't think the two are necessarily connected...
Me: No, no! When you watch "Murder She Wrote", you learn that everything's connected! Building burning down? Murder that looks like an accident? Crazy letters flooding the town? Murder that looks like a suicide? ALL CONNECTED. Therefore, the two signs are DEFINITELY connected!
Madre: ... okay...
***
The sad thing is that all these conversations happened today...
Sometimes I question my sanity.
Then I realize that sanity is based on cultural perception.
Then I get bored of questioning sanity and watch "Murder She Wrote".
"Murder She Wrote" makes me question my sanity.
It's a vicious, vicious cycle...
Less than three,
~ Summer
Saturday, July 16, 2011
How To Tie A Tie
If you, like me, have a service job, chances are you've had to deal with more than your share of a**holes. In lieu of this, I've concocted a tried-and-true list of the top five ways to get rid of obnoxious customers. Trust me, they work.
1. Aww, your baby's so cute! Can I give it a dog biscuit?
2. Sorry, we only serve pure bloods.
3. Would you me to refill your ugly mug?
4. Congratulations! You've just won a free assassination.
5. Sorry about the wait, I was busy writing you a list of the closest weight-loss facilities. Did you want whipped cream on your drink?
And there you go.
Less than three,
~ Summer
1. Aww, your baby's so cute! Can I give it a dog biscuit?
2. Sorry, we only serve pure bloods.
3. Would you me to refill your ugly mug?
4. Congratulations! You've just won a free assassination.
5. Sorry about the wait, I was busy writing you a list of the closest weight-loss facilities. Did you want whipped cream on your drink?
And there you go.
Less than three,
~ Summer
Why Reg loves long-distance relationships--or rather, why Reg is trying to convince herself she does
I thought I'd share my favorite things about long-distance relationships, based on my own experiences.
When I am writing this, I would like to specify that I mean the sort of dysfunctional long-distance relationship I am in--not functional long-distance relationships like Sayuri's amazing parents. I love them dearly and I envy their dedication and devotion. I cannot include anything about their relationship in the list because I believe the only thing they like about long-distance relationships is their other half and the relationship. They don't aspire to the ultimate goal of continuing the long-distance relationship, but of being together again.
1: No PDA. Ever.
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