I have this theory that not only do girls have a type that they prefer in guys, but there is a type of guys that prefer them. Unfortunately, these types don't always align.
For example, I like well-dressed men that are considerably older than me. Yet I find myself chased by short fedora-wearing boys. Which wouldn't be a problem, but my experiences with them have conditioned me to be wary.
Instance one: I was in Target (that's were all the cool kids hang, obviously) in the shampoo aisle, and a guy about my age and height wearing a fedora passed by, giving me the eye. I saw him five more times while shopping, and once in the parking lot.
Instance two: I went on a quasi-date with the rat bastard that was supposed to take me to prom. I knew he was about my height, but I was OK with it. However, to my horror, what does he wear on the quasi-date but a fedora.
Instance three: In DC a while ago I went to a dance a hotel. A short boy in a fedora asked me to dance and I politely declined because I did not know him. After he pleaded with me, I
consented. Then he told me all about how it "was fate that we met tonight" and "that I was such a classy lady." Which brings me to two new life rules.
Rule 96 section 1: Do not, under any circumstances, date any one that uses the words "lady" or "naughty" to describe you.
Rule 96 section 2: Run if "fate" or "destiny" or the phrase "will you have my babies?" is used in context in any conversation with a guy.
Anyway, this guy followed me to a movie that was playing in a conference room of the hotel and sat next to me. Then he asked for my phone number and I pulled the shameful rejection tactic of the fake number. In the morning at the free continental breakfast he tracked me down and asked if I had gotten any of his texts (plural?!) I (again, shamefully) lied and said my phone didn't work so far from home. Then I left as quickly as possible (I might have ran.)
And that's why I'm afraid of short boys in fedoras. I suppose well-dressed, considerably older men are probably afraid of me. For justifiable reasons.
Your butterfly,
Regette
Oh my darling, what are we going to do with your and Summer's unfortunate luck of attracting rather odd young men? You can come race cardboard boats here instead!
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